


Don't leave me to be born without you

by asterCrash



Category: NieR: Automata (Video Game)
Genre: F/M, Spoilers for the intro mission nothing else
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-26
Updated: 2018-03-26
Packaged: 2019-04-08 09:29:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14102442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asterCrash/pseuds/asterCrash
Summary: 2B remembers, 9S doesn't and remembering alone isn't enough.





	Don't leave me to be born without you

It seemed so easy, with machines towering over her and chanting for her destruction, it seemed so easy for 2B to remove her black box and prime it for a reaction that would wipe her from the world. 9S was sitting there, so close, his body damaged beyond hope of repair yet still smiling as he removed primed his own box. Their bodies were touching as the power faded from her cells and she braced herself for non-existence. A countdown played and she didn’t hear it, just thought about how close she wanted to be with 9S before they both died.

2B woke up in her room, with 9S on and in her mind. He performed the routine diagnostics as she came back into herself, the powerful muscles of a combat model tensing and relaxing as she woke up from not existing yet. She remembered with painful clarity what it had been like to make the decision that ended her life and accomplished her mission, she could not compartmentalise it as something that happened to someone else and she wasn’t sure she wanted to.

9S was there, and he told her that they were to report to the Commander, no sign of what they’d been through on his overly expressive face. She pressed him, until he admitted that he didn’t remember. That their special moment together there at the end of existence was now hers alone. That, in that moment of intimacy, he had faced oblivion alone and prioritised uploading her memories back to the bunker. They hadn’t even known each other an hour.

Emotions welled up in her, powerful and unwanted and unable to be stopped. They were prohibited but they were stronger than she was. 9S turned, oblivious to her struggle, turned to leave her room and go on with his life, but the feelings in her chest told her she couldn’t bear that. She grabbed his hand, stronger than he could ever be, and pulled him back until his body was flush with hers. She didn’t know how to hold another android against her, so she settled for pinning him to the wall instead, their faces cheek-to-cheek. He was confused, she could tell, and he had every right to be. He was not the 9S who gave himself up for her, yet he was still the 9S who had become that 9S when the situation required it. His voice was the voice of the nearest friend she’d had after her entire squadron had been obliterated around her. She may not be the 2B he saved, but she remembered being that 2B because he had saved her.

There was too much emotion, it was more than she could contain. She didn’t know how to handle herself like this, hot all over, her mind spinning in futility like discarded metal thrown out into space. She fought for an explanation she could give, to him or to herself, and found all her options wanting. At last she whispered, lips brushing his ear, and told him that she wanted him to know they had shared something together on the planet’s surface and that even if he did not remember, she would never forget.

She pulled back to look at him, his expression was one of surprise, which was understandable but still hurt her to see. She wanted to give him what he had only been able to save for her. She wanted him to know what it felt like to have only one other person with you at the end of everything, and to find that one person enough.

It seemed so easy, the two of them alone in her room, it seemed so easy to lean in and press her lips to his, listening to the soft moan he made when they kissed. She expected him to push her away, on some level, to not understand what she was going through and what she needed. He didn’t push her away. Instead he folded into the kiss, his hands wrapping around her waist and pulling himself in, leaning up to let her claim him. Her body was on fire and her arms seemed so empty, still her mind was screaming that it wasn’t enough, it could never be enough to sate her hunger for him.

It seemed to last forever, though her system clock told her it was only the first hour of her existence, as she picked him up from the wall and carried him to her bed to have as her own for even a short time. He didn’t fight when she opened the buttons of his uniform and shed it from his skin, he helped when she started to remove her own. Just kissing him didn’t seem enough, and she broke from his lips to press kisses into his neck and collarbone, tracing down his body and touching all the points she thought his sensitivity would be highest. She had not done this before that she could remember, to the best of her knowledge neither had he. There was no reason for them to have. Surely if any android had experienced such a moment it had been decommissioned. Emotions must have been prohibited for this reason above all others, how else could YorHa have survived?

It didn’t stop her, as 9S pulled her back up to his mouth so he could kiss her again, newly bold hands exploring the curves of her form and touching her where she’d touched him, expecting to find her sensitive and proving himself correct. Clever little scout, so observant and quick to learn. She learned quickly too, as he helped her wrap her legs between his, so that they could lock together like they’d been built for it. She didn’t know how he’d known to do this, didn’t ask, just whispered pleas into his ears as she rocked them both up and down, the smooth friction of their bodies keeping them both in the moment and beyond any concerns outside of it. He carded fingers back through her hair and the sensation set her body alight all over again. She wondered if this is what it had felt like to die in the black box reaction they had created together. She wondered if humans had ever experienced anything so beautiful as this.

She pressed more kisses into his neck, fierce and insistent and dominating. He didn’t remember, but he was hers and she would never let him forget that. Something built within her, something approached. She heard it in him as well, as his breath grew quick and almost panicked, soft moans escaping between the rocking of her thigh between his legs. She abandoned any thought of touching him delicately and instead wrapped her arms under and around him, crushing his body against hers as she felt the crest of whatever was coming towards her arrive.

Sensory overload hit, shuddering and blinding and perfect. She felt like every setting in her internal configuration had been slammed to its maximum, and for a moment there in the aftermath she checked through them, one by one, to ensure she hadn’t damaged something in her heat of the moment. 9S came down with her, her hand on one of his cheeks and the other pressed up and into the softer part of her chest. His breathing didn’t stabilise for almost two minutes, she didn’t stop holding him until he had returned to normal.

The emotion was still there, all the things in her that made her throw him against a wall and take him to her bed and do unknowable things with him were still within her, but now it seemed manageable. She had surmounted the greatest peak of it and was now in control. She knew she must be defective. There was no other explanation. She had died, she had been reborn, and then she had violated YorHa directives repeatedly within her own quarters. She would be damned if she could figure out which directives specifically prohibited this, but emotion was prohibited and this was emotion.

9S joined her in wordlessly dressing himself. His hair reordered itself with a buzz of static discharging and she did the same. He helped ensure her skirt was set properly on her hips and she made sure his tie was straight. They did not talk about what they just did. There were no words to say, and she was sure from the expression of pure astonishment on his face that he had no more an understanding of what they’d just been through than she did. She proved to herself that she could still control her emotions when she placed her hands on his shoulders, bent down and gave him one more kiss directly on his mouth. He reciprocated, though his hands stayed by his sides.

“What was that for?” He asked, when at last they parted.

2B thought about her answer for a second, exhausting every possible explanation because there simply were none, before finally admitting, “I wanted to thank you.”

**Author's Note:**

> I've barely started the game but I just had to get this fic out in the world!
> 
> No spoilers in the comments pretty please!


End file.
